Every now and then, I like to take a break from writing, get out of Springfield for a few days, and do something that doesn’t involve staring at a blinking cursor. This week I’m down in Durant, Oklahoma on a little mini-vacation, which mostly translates into good food, a little relaxation, and occasionally finding something to do that’s not work-related.

One of those things was catching *Spider-Man: Brand New Day* in 3D at the theater inside Choctaw Casino.

Now, I wasn’t exactly counting down the days until this movie came out. In fact, I went into it pretty cold. I’d recently rewatched the previous Tom Holland Spider-Man films and figured I’d see how the newest entry stacked up. Maybe it would surprise me. Maybe it would remind me why I used to get excited every time a new superhero movie hit theaters.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t quite how things played out.

My final score?

**5/10.**

The movie wasn’t bad.

It also wasn’t good enough to be memorable.

It was just kind of… there.

Before seeing *Brand New Day*, I had recently watched the previous Tom Holland Spider-Man movies. If I had to rank them, I’d put them in this order:

1. No Way Home
2. Homecoming
3. Far From Home
4. Brand New Day

Or if we’re using my shorthand:

**3, 1, 2, 4.**

Unfortunately, *Brand New Day* lands firmly at the bottom of the list.

The first thing that disappointed me was actually the 3D. I paid for the 3D version because I figured if there was ever a movie that might take advantage of the format, a Spider-Man movie should be it. The web-slinging alone ought to make it worthwhile.

It really didn’t.

Was it cool?

Sure.

Was it amazing?

No.

And yes, the pun was absolutely intended.

Nothing stood out. Nothing made me think, “Okay, that was worth the extra money.”

As for the movie itself, there were a few things I liked. Hulk and Punisher showing up was fun. Tom Holland continues to do a solid job as Spider-Man. He’s probably the best thing about these movies at this point. There was also a fight sequence involving the Hand after Peter starts giving in to his mutation that I thought had some potential.

The problem is I saw the entire storyline coming from a mile away.

The second they introduced the struggle with the mutation, I knew exactly where it was going. There was never any suspense. Never any doubt.

That’s kind of the theme of the entire movie.

Everything is predictable.

The main villain turns out to be a version of Jean Grey that wasn’t even remotely comic-book accurate, and then, in a twist that nobody over the age of twelve is going to be surprised by, the real villain is revealed to be Damage Control.

Imagine my shock.

The government agency was secretly the bad guy.

I know. I almost fell out of my seat.

The bigger issue, though, is that there really isn’t much of a plot here. The story feels as thin as one-ply toilet paper. Things happen, characters show up, fights break out, and then eventually the movie ends.

The Scorpion is barely used.

Punisher is barely used.

Most of the supporting cast feels wasted.

Punisher especially left me scratching my head. He’s running around New York shooting people, and apparently the NYPD has collectively decided this is somebody else’s problem. Nobody seems particularly interested in stopping a heavily armed vigilante who is openly operating in the middle of the city.

It doesn’t make any sense.

As a writer, little things like that pull me right out of the story.

Speaking of being a writer, this movie never gave me the feeling that the people behind it had anything they were excited to say. Everything felt safe. Familiar. Predictable. The plot relied heavily on clichés and well-worn tropes, and at no point did I feel like anybody involved was taking a risk.

Maybe that’s what disappointed me the most.

I wasn’t expecting a masterpiece.

I wasn’t expecting *The Dark Knight*.

I was expecting something that would stick with me after I left the theater.

Instead, I had to get up and take a bathroom break during the movie. Normally, if I’m really invested in a story, I’m rushing to get back because I don’t want to miss anything important.

This time?

I took my sweet time.

When I got back, it didn’t feel like I’d missed anything that mattered.

That’s not a good sign.

What frustrates me most is that Tom Holland is still a good Spider-Man. I’ve felt for a while now that he’s trapped in movies that never live up to his potential. He brings energy and charm to the role, but the stories he’s being given just aren’t strong enough to elevate the character.

That’s honestly how I feel about most of the Tom Holland Spider-Man run. They’re good popcorn movies. They’re entertaining while you’re sitting there eating your nachos and drinking your Coke.

But once the credits roll?

There’s not much left.

Nothing to think about.

Nothing to discuss.

Nothing to chew on.

Just another superhero movie in a market that’s already overflowing with superhero movies.

Maybe I’m being harder on this movie than some people will be. That’s entirely possible. After all, I’ve spent most of my adult life telling stories, and when you spend that much time thinking about plots, characters, pacing, and worldbuilding, you start noticing things that the average moviegoer probably doesn’t care about.

But at the same time, I don’t think I’m asking for much.

I don’t need every superhero movie to redefine cinema. I don’t need every Spider-Man movie to be *The Dark Knight*. What I do want is a story that takes a few chances, gives me something memorable, and leaves me talking about it after I leave the theater.

*Brand New Day* never quite got there for me.

Tom Holland continues to be a solid Spider-Man, but at some point “solid” isn’t enough if the stories around him never rise above average. That’s been my biggest issue with most of this iteration of Spider-Man. They’re enjoyable while you’re watching them, but they’re rarely memorable afterward.

By the time I got back to my hotel, I was already thinking more about where I was going to eat dinner than anything that had happened in the movie. That’s probably not the reaction Marvel was hoping for.

So my final score stays where it started:

**5 out of 10.**

Not terrible.

Not amazing.

Just okay.

And honestly, Spider-Man deserves better than “just okay.”

Have you seen *Spider-Man: Brand New Day* yet? If so, what did you think? Am I being too harsh, or did you walk away feeling the same way?