The Greatest Quest – Part Two

Once more into the breach, dear friends. Welcome to the second installment of the Greatest Quest. I will search far and wide for the greatest hotdog experience out there. Sure, this might be a quest that lasts a lifetime, but what the hell. I love hotdogs and it’s not a quest that will be difficult to fulfill. Just try hotdogs at places where I eat. Easy. However, I’m learning just how few places have hotdogs on their menu.

What the hell? This is America and there’s nothing more American than a good old-fashioned hotdog. Honestly, I was surprised that so few places offer some sort of hotdog or sausage on their menu. Heck, at one time, McDonalds had bratwurst on the menu. Hey, McDonalds! There’s something you could bring back. Bring back that bratwurst! It was the best damned thing on your menu. I’d WANT to eat there, again. It’s damned hard to beat a good bratwurst.

Anyway, I digress. It’s not difficult to do, at least for me. I can focus like a laser when I’m working on a book, but on other projects, I’m distracted like a cat chasing a red dot on the carpet. It happens. I’ll try to keep that to a minimum.

So, for this installment, I tried Sonic’s hotdog. I’ve got to say, for a place that calls themselves America’s Drive-In, they certainly didn’t go all out on their hotdogs. Let’s get into the meat of this article and discuss it, shall we?

1. Casing snap/Quality of the product. Again, this is two categories in one, so I break down the points with five for each. Casing snap gets a solid two. The hotdogs aren’t anything special and the casing snap is no better than what you can get at the grocery store. It’s a basic, no-frills hotdog. Quality is about the same. It’s a middle of the road, nothing special hotdog. Tastes about like one you buy at the store. No big deal. Two points per category for a total of four points.
2. The bun. Also, nothing unexpected. I found the bun to be just a basic bun, just like a grocery store. It was soft, so it gets an extra point for that, but it’s not anything out of the ordinary. So, to that end, it gets four points total. Slightly below average, is what I’d say.
3. Lasty, Taste. It was a hotdog. That’s about all I can say for it. No frills, nothing awesome or special. All in all, it was the same kind of hotdog you could have made by boiling it on the stove at home. Three points. I give it that because if I had made it at home with the same quality hotdog, I would have grilled it. That alone can make a normal hotdog taste great.

So, let’s tally the results shall we. Four points for Casing Snap/Quality, Four points for the bun and three points for the taste. For a total of… wait for it… eleven out of thirty possible points. That’s less than half, but it’s not that great of a hotdog. Average or a bit below would be how I’d describe it, anyway.

Now, before anyone gets angry because I besmirched Sonic… take a moment and remember… these are my OPINIONS. If your experience tells you otherwise, then, go with your own gut. After all, if beauty is in the eye of the beholder, then the corollary would be that taste is in the tastebuds of the taster.

Hotdogs are the Great American food. They’re so ingrained in our lives that they’re what we think of at holidays, at ball parks and picnics all around the country. What cookout would be complete without a good hotdog on the grill? What baseball game would be complete without a ballpark hotdog slathered in ketchup, mustard, and onions? What picnic would be the same without a good hotdog?

The ubiquitous hotdog. So simple, yet so easy to do badly. If you enjoy food like I do, then I’m sure you want to take the extra time to make it taste its best. Don’t buy the cheapest hotdog brand in the cooler. Treat yourself to a good hotdog, all beef frank, or well-made sausage. Life is too short to eat crappy food. Find those quality buns, pick a good brand of ketchup/mustard, get those good hotdogs. Your family will thank you at your next cook out.

So, until next time folks… I’ll be searching for the perfect hotdog. Maybe I’ll find it at some roadside diner in the middle of nowhere. Maybe it’ll be at some restaurant in the city. Maybe, just maybe… it’ll be in my own backyard. Wherever this quest takes me, you can rest assured of this. I love a good hotdog and I’m more than willing to call it as I see it. Am I right? Am I wrong? Try it for yourself and see. The Great American Hotdog is out there, and I shall have it. After all, it’s the Greatest Quest.

Call me Ishmael.

DA

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